Insecure

You know.. I never thought that I would still feel that life isn’t fair, but recently, I have. I felt like I was sixteen years old all over again — when everything happened to everyone else and not me.

Well, I was at a good friend’s barbecue, and we exchanged some good gossip (horrible, I know), and it felt so good that I wasn’t the only one feeling that it was not fair. Sometimes all you need is a few other people in the same boat with you. :)

It’s so funny how you think you are going to be okay with what you have right now, when suddenly all of the joy in doing something gets sucked out and all there is left is the negative things.

I feel so defeated and very demotivated. I was happy with what I have, why did it have to happen? Sorry that I have to refrain myself from fully disclosing this whole thing, but it’ll be unethical if I give you the whole exposé. Haha. Nothing too big, but it’s something that’s been bringing me down lately.

I can’t talk about it with the people I usually talk to with my problems, because they wouldn’t understand the situation. You would have to be in the shoes to really get why I’m bitching and moaning. Besides, you can’t trust a lot of people.

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3 responses to “Insecure

  1. I don’t usually bitch or moan to anyone except my boyfriend and sometimes (when things get really rough) a counselor. I got sick of people telling me that every single thing I go through is “just a phase” (oh, the irony of owning that domain name once), so I stopped talking to people about personal issues. You just have to hang in there. It’s true, there aren’t a lot of people you can trust. I can count the number of people I trust on one hand.

  2. the only person i bitch and moan to is the boyfriend. even though my best friends are around, everyone’s going through their own little issues and i don’t really want to burden them with my own.

    don’t you find that as you grow older, you end up having to deal with a lot of your own problems? or maybe that’s just me :)

  3. The boyfriends are poor souls that have to hear us bitch and moan, right? Thankfully they are so understanding and we found them just in time. :)

    Dhil, sometimes we just need to be listened to, right? I only talk about personal issues when I feel that it doesn’t bother me anymore, when I feel that my knowledge in it will help someone understand the situation better. It’s sad that as you grow up, the only people you trust are those who you grow with.

    Di, for me, I don’t have a lot of best buds, but even then I only talk to the boyfriend about it because he judges the least. Yep, and you thought they can’t ever bring you down once and a while.

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